How to Be Irresistible

by Raymond David Salas

Have you ever noticed when you are in the presence of certain individuals you feel or sense a magnetic, higher energy and vibration? People will often say this person has “charisma,” or a “presence,” or simply has “it,” that an indefinable something we all recognize when we experience it. How do we become one of these charming, enchanting, and charismatic people ourselves? How do we positively raise the energy of others and any room or environment we enter into? In short, how do we become irresistible?

The answer can be found in our thoughts and intentions, and the resulting energy and vibrations from them.

Here are my recommendations:

  • Think positively.

I know it sounds cliché, even corny or unrealistic to some, to say “Just think positive. It’s all about positive thinking.” Like it or not, the fact is every one of your thoughts is creating vibrations within you and around you, including your environment and your world. Furthermore, these vibrations are manifesting as the experiences of your life. Whatever you are focusing on, you are creating and inviting into your experience (both good and bad). This law of attraction is universal law, just like gravity, so there is no way to turn it “off,” put it on “hold,” or control it in any way. Think of it as your internal “default” setting or the way you are “wired.” Your only control is the thoughts you choose to think on a moment by moment basis. Therefore, if you are wanting and desiring greater joy, freedom, satisfaction, health, or well-being in any aspect (or all) of your life, your only route is to begin thinking more positively starting right now. There is no other way.

Here are some tools I have found to help you remain consistently more positive on a regular basis:

  • Focus on what you love and enjoy.

When your mind and thoughts are focused on the things you love, it is like you are sending out a positive vibration to the universe that says “I love this! Send me more of this please.” Therefore, practice focusing on what you love and enjoy. Let these thoughts occupy your mind and thinking, as much as possible.


All too often, we focus on what we don’t want. We say or think things like “I don’t like it when … (fill in blank),” “(Fill in blank)… really bugs me,” or “I hate it when … (fill in blank) happens.” Stop all of this internal and external criticizing and negative dialogue. Release all of these thoughts of what you don’t want now. Simply withdraw your attention away from them and let them all go. Yes, it’s that simple. As you do this, you will be actually aligning your energy with what you do want, which is the highest vibration of all and the most attractive state-of-mind to possess.


  • Appreciate more.

Whenever you are with other people, mentally perform what I call “The Big Three.” Silently acknowledge three or more characteristics (mental, emotional, physical, or spiritual) that you appreciate and like about them. There are no limitations here. It could be their eyes, smile, presence, personality, cool shoes, or anything else. The key is to only focus on what you like and appreciate and ignore all of the rest. In addition, wherever you find yourself, practice “The Big Three”, in the same manner, on yourself, your environment, relationships, and in your daily activities. You will see and feel an improvement immediately. When you are in a state of appreciation and gratitude, you are offering no resistance to the universe and are literally attracting to yourself all of the things you truly desire. It’s like you become a giant magnet for all of the things you consider to be good and desirable in your life. How cool is that!


  • Send out good “vibes.”

In the book A New Beginning II, Abraham offers the following suggestion whenever you encounter another person. Mentally say to them something like “I think you’re wonderful. I want to only see the wonderful in you. I want you to see only the wonderful in me.” When you do this, you are sending out a good “vibe” or vibration they can actually sense both consciously and subconsciously. When you practice this, it will make others more comfortable when they are around you and your interactions will be more positive, satisfying, and rewarding. A powerful variation of this practice is to mentally greet others with the Sanskrit word “Namasté,” which can be translated to mean “the Divinity in me salutes the Divinity in you.”

  • Genuinely smile more.

When you are genuinely smiling, you are automatically sending out positive vibrations to your world. The key is to be genuine. A fake or insecure smile makes most people uncomfortable. A serious, upset, or “straight” face can be even more uncomfortable for others. Don’t believe me? Look into a mirror and practice smiling both ways and also looking serious or upset. What do you see? There is your proof. The bottom line is a person who is genuinely smiling is happy, instantly puts others at ease, and appears more attractive. Observe a smiling baby or child and see for yourself.

Once you are thinking and feeling more positively, here is the next and final guideline I recommend:


  • Be calm and assertive.

I love the television show The Dog Whisperer (with Cesar Millan) on the National Geographic channel. Each week, Cesar is called in to solve the most difficult dog behavioral issues for dogs and their owners. After watching this show regularly, I concluded that 99% of the problems represented are resolved by changing the attitude, intentions, behavior, and thought processes of the owners, not the dogs. Cesar’s consistent recommendation and message to dog owners for greater harmony at home and the overall well-being of their dog(s) is to become a consistent, calm, yet assertive “pack leader.” Dogs instinctually look to their owners as the pack leader. Dogs cannot be easily fooled either both because they will sense and only respond to energy and vibrations, not actual spoken words or commands. If the owners do not become the consistent, calm, and assertive pack leaders their dogs are looking for, all of the problems and behavioral issues begin here for the dogs and their owners.

After pondering all of this, I realized the same lessons can also be applied to our lives and experiences. The universe wants each of us to be the “pack leader” of our own lives for the greatest joy, happiness, and freedom possible. However, if we send out mixed messages (through our thoughts, energy, and vibrations) to the universe and its law of attraction, we will manifest mixed results for ourselves. Yet, if we are calm, assertive, and consistent in our messages to the universe and its law of attraction, we will manifest consistent results in our lives.

When your energy is calm and assertive, you are at your greatest point of power in your life and world. When you add positive thoughts and vibrations to all of this, you will become magnetically attractive and irresistible, not only to others, but to the entire universe. Wow! Who knew?